IF ONLY I HAD A DREAM

I am a minority. I have been since the day I entered this life.  I’m schizoaffective which less than 1% of the world could relate to. The largest minority group in this country is the ADA. We have and still have so much to overcome. God knows it’s not easy but as a Board Member of NAMI at least I’m trying.

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you just might find, you get what you need..

You Cant Always Get What You Want

 

Just took my nightly meds (Klonipin 3mg, Lithium 900 mg, Lutuda 120 mg, Ambien 10 mg, Lipitor 40 mg, Plavix 75 mg, Tylenol PM and some I can’t remember along with a glass of Merlot. I tell you it’s the ultimate night night cocktail and I would know after a lifetime of insomnia. Latuda is like nothing I’ve ever taken. For the first time ever I’m falling asleep early, like 9:30 – 10:30pm, but I’m waking up wide awake at 3 to 4 am. Used to be I wouldn’t fall asleep until 3 to 4 am and sleep like a rock till noon.

Anyways I just washed down all my meds and Merlot while watching Season 1 Ep 1 of Californication.

Now we all know that The X files are David Duchovny’s best work but I must say the pilot episode of Californication is a fucking classic. It even starts out with my favorite song by my favorite band. I swear if the first 10 minutes doesn’t put a smile on your face your either clinically depressed or you should join a nunnery and or monastery.

 

Saw my psychiatrist today

I saw my psychiatrist today. I see her every 30 days now. She again raised my anti-psychotic (Latuda) dosage. She has gradually raised by 40 mg every month since she started me at 20 mg a few months ago. Last night I took 80 mg and its still ok. No noticeable side effects, no blunting. The maximum FDA allowed Latuda dosage is 120 mg. Today my psychiatrist raised my Latuda dosage to 120 mg. She told to call if I noticed any problems or side effects. I noticed one very troubling side effect of the 120 mg today already and I haven’t even taken one. When I went to the pharmacy they told my Latuda copay was going to be $80.00. Damn plus six or seven other meds I get filled there that are 5 to 10 dollars each. Thank God Lithium is only $4.00 because I’ll probably never come off of that.

I also asked her,my psychiatrist, if she knew of any good private mental health facilities of hospitals in Georgia. She told me I could probably find my answers with Google. I see her again in 30 days.

On a lighter note..I’m looking forward to my NAMI meeting tonight. They are my friends and kindred spirits and I’m on the board:. )

Now a little bit about my previous post:

I got my dad’s electrician to come over a couple of days ago. He couldn’t get lights to work either and while he couldn’t find a shortage he also told that he didn’t see anything out of place or unusual there and probably the light kit had gone bad. So he installed a whole new light kit and the lights work perfectly now. So I guess that mystery will go unsolved or until something else happens.

Tonight’s NAMI Meeting

I am behind on blogging my NAMI experiences. I still have to talk about our State Conference and the Transforming to Wellness Conference a week or two after that. I procrastinate when it comes to using my keyboard for anything other than gaming or celebrity’s boobs. For email I mostly use my iPhone. I wonder if Siri can take dictation. As you may or may not know May is Mental Health Awareness month. We’ve worked NAMI booths at the hospital, Miller-Coors beer plant and other locations. There I think that list all the events and conferences I am behind on blogging about but I’m not catching them up tonight. No tonight I want to talk about the significance of this evening’s NAMI meeting. You see the way it works is at the start of each meeting the entire group is together for either a guest speaker or just a short series of announcements. After that we break into two separate groups. BTW theres a reason I’m explaining this as you shall soon see. Ok the two groups are: Family to Family support group and the Peer to Peer support group. I am in the Peer to Peer as its for people with a diagnosed mental illness. Family to Family group is for relatives and caregivers of someone with a mental illness. Why this matters to me tonight is this evening for the first time ever my wife,Wendy, accompanied me to the NAMI meeting and she sat with the relatives and caregivers group. Approximately two hours later my Peer to Peer group wrapped up and I went next door to find Wendy. She was wiping away tears as she had shared what it was like being a bipolar’s spouse. She also joined NAMI tonight though I’m sure she won’t be as active as I am. That’s ok. Tonight was a good night for me.